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A Message from a Baseball Mama's Heart...

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I have a few words to share...this post is from my heart...and perhaps geared to the younger ones starting the travel ball circuit...and also to the parents of the kids who are on the ball circuit now... Nathan has been playing ball since he was four years old. He was five when he knew his dream was to play college baseball. Throughout the years of little league, travel ball, middle school ball and high school ball, we have seen a lot! We have experienced a lot! And if we could go back (to the younger years) and do things a little differently, I think we would. We have lived and we have learned. But along the journey, we have had some really good times and some really bad times...good coaches, bad coaches...good parents, parents that stab you in the back. Yep, all of the above, if I am being honest. And I have no reason for not being honest. This post is to perhaps share our learned experiences to help those coming up... Through the good and the bad, one thing we NEVE
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About College...and Stuff

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The day after Christmas I was strolling through the mall, having a frappuccino and a good ole' time listening to mall music...I turned the corner and and there IT was staring at me with no apologies...sitting there taunting me, flaunting the inevitable right before my eyes, streamers and all...shiny, Happy New Year hats with "2018" floating atop of them like they were going to party like it was 1999... It was then it hit me...my baby boy was going to be a graduate of the class of 2018...I have known this since he was born...I have had many years to prepare for this...but in this very moment, I felt not prepared at all...I was not ready! I am a visual person so for me, seeing the numbers on the party hats and headbands just gutted me for a minute... Reality...the year was not "on the way..."  IT was here! And here I am in the middle of IT... IT is time!  IT is here!  IT is happening! I am doing my best to embrace IT and evolve into
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Kisses from Heaven and a Christmas Miracle

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December 8th, 2017 was a day that we won't soon forget in the south!  And neither will our northern friends either...trust me, if you had a friend in the south, you were seeing the posts all day of the snowfall that left us with memories we will cherish for a lifetime!  Matter of fact, chances of you getting a snowman Christmas card from them are pretty high!  Just sayin'! This day granted us a long awaited Christmas miracle of the white stuff straight from the heavens...snow!  Snow fell down and we all got giddy and joyful...we laughed like the good ole' days when life wasn't so difficult...everyone was smiling and happy!  It was almost a non-belief, kind of, state of shock...I believe we were all in it!  It was heavenly and magical!  It was needed! This day will always provide incredible family memories for so many of us in the south...but for this southern mama, this day also holds a most sacred memory for me ...keep reading...I'll get to it, bear with m
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Grateful for Investments...

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On the eve of Thanksgiving 2017, I have been reflecting upon the many blessings in our lives.  I am going to take a moment and share just a few thoughts from my heart today... Three of the biggest blessings in my life are my three boys that you hear me talk about all of the time...write about....and you know it, post pictures of! But without the two men that I am going to write about today, I wouldn't have these incredible gifts that call me mom... As you all know, this is Ronnie's first Thanksgiving without his father here on earth...surviving football season without Pop was tough, really tough.  Nathan looked forward to Pop being here to see him play his last football season of high school, but heartbreakingly, we had an empty seat at every single ballgame, and it was a painful reminder of his absence in our lives. We did not attend a single game where his absence was not notably present in our lives... Opening day of college football was difficult...when
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When I'm Not There...Mission Acomplished

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The date, November 16, 2017, is rebelliously glaring at me from a distance on the calendar laughing at how rapidly time is marching on... The month of October?  Well, that would be...how much time do you have?  How much Kleenex is within reach and of course, how much chocolate is in the pantry...(or hidden in my closet?)  Did I say that?   I have some making up for lost time in the Sappy Senior Mama department, at least in the "penning it down" category...I certainly have not derailed from experiencing the emotions of Senior Breakfast, Senior Night of football, Nathan's last snap as as high school Pirate...nope, ALL of it and MORE, I have lived through, I have cried through and on the other side of it all, am still not going to write about it...yet.  One day.  Sigh. I sit down today to share with you all a little piece of my heart that will live on in the days and years to come for Nathan when he is away at college and even long after I am gone...  For Na
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I Know What Time It Is...

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This post may be all over the place tonight...pull up a chair and some chocolate...we may need it! Toward the end of my pregnancy with Nathan, I was really uncomfortable and I remember thinking the day would never get here for me to have him...I was so ready!  I was so ready to have him until right before I had him!  Yes, you read that correctly!  I was ready to have him until right before I had him! I began to wonder if I was ready to be a mama.  How would I know what he needed?  What if we weren't good at being parents?  I started thinking about all of the things in this great big world that he would have to face and it scared me.  It scared me to think we were going to be responsible for his life...all of it. We were in our mid-twenties with careers and we were afraid of what we didn't know. Then I started thinking how "safe" he was inside of me and I wanted time to slow down!  I wanted him to stay safe for as long as I could keep him safe.  True
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Kindergarten and Becoming "Broker"

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Today I am taking it all the way back to kindergarten!  Yes, kindergarten, for kicks and giggles, and perhaps a few tears..oh, who am I kidding?  Where's my Kleenex and chocolate? Here we go...August of 2005...Nathan began kindergarten.  This was Nathan's first year of school and his first year of school came less than two months after his brother passed away....talk about hard to let him go!!!  After losing Matthew, it was, for a lack of adequate words, devastatingly difficult to let go of Nathan immediately after...It was the opposite of natural because after loss, you want to hold everything else that is close to you as tight as you can.  I felt like I had a big monster pulling my child away.  I was so sick still and I knew I had to get better for him.  The emotional battle coupled with the physical battle was heavy...on the days I didn't think I could persevere through, there stood this beautiful brown eyed boy to help me.  He was my inspiration and my greatest sou
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